Monday, June 13, 2016

Thanks, Pregnancy: 6 Unusual Things I've Cried Over Lately

Nothing makes a grown woman more irrational and weepy than a 15-year-old girl than pregnancy hormones, and Chaun from Hiccups and Pastries knows it all too well. I can really relate to her guest post today in far too many ways... can you?

I'm a little envious of Jenny right now that she gets to be on her maternity leave, because I still have 6 months of pregnancy to go before I can get to that point.

Even so, I'm feeling especially pregnant right now, because all this crying that's been going on lately. (I thought this stage ended when I moved out for college, leaving my three teenage sisters at home.)

You definitely need this pregnancy humor in your life. Those crazy pregnancy hormones will have you crying about the oddest things. Bursting into tears over something as silly as a burrito is definitely not funny at the time, but in retrospect? Well, you be the judge of that. #pregnanthumor #pregnancyhormones #pregnancytruths #funny #crying #unremarkablefiles

With my first baby, I was frustrated with most things that had a face, especially my husband. This time around, I'm just literally crying over stuff like this.

1. Freaking delicious sushi.

You wouldn't expect glorious sushi rolls in Utah, but then again, we are a state of many delectable surprises.

Take funeral potatoes, for example. Like Utah sushi, it doesn't sound like something that's appropriate to go nuts on at a party. Or, uh, a funeral. But Utah natives know how to make any occasion a good celebration of food.

When I found out I was pregnant, I knew that I would need to celebrate with some salmon and eel sauce sushi. Just the thought of it brings happy tears to my eyes.

2. My OB-GYN.

She told me I could eat basically whatever, just not sushi.


"What if it's the deep fried kind?" my husband asked the doctor. He could see the beginning crumbles of my internal infrastructure.

"No. Deep fried is not cooked." The OB doc paused, and then said, "I just hate all sushi and think it shouldn't ever be eaten."

Sooo, is sushi actually bad for me, or am I just a victim of her personal rage?

3. This letter from a teacher to her 3rd grade students.

I heard this letter  read over the K-LOVE station a few weeks ago, and I couldn't keep from tearing up and driving away ambiguously into the sunset as I listened along.

"The scores you will get from these tests will tell you something, but they will not tell you everything. These tests do not define you. There are many ways of being smart. YOU are smart! You are enough! You are the light that brightens my day and the reason I am happy to come to work each day. So, in the midst of all of these tests, remember that there is no way to “test” all of the amazing and awesome things that make you, YOU."

Reading back on it again, I think it's super sweet (and accurate!) but I'm not feeling the mushy-gushy tears I felt before. What about you?

4. Burritos.

My sister texted me a picture of her and her boyfriend eating a burrito. She said something like, "We had a great date night!" but all I could see was "We have burritos. You don't. Also, we hate you."

I whimpered and moaned at my misfortune. Burritos! I needed a burrito. All my self-worth was in that burrito.

Taylor, in an effort to make turn that frown upside down, but to avoid a midnight run at Del Taco, brought me a glass of milk and some graham crackers.

I guess my milk did taste a little like a burrito, once my tears were well mixed into it.

5. Speaking of Taylor, his stomach made me cry once.

I didn't understand that this was pregnancy hormones until it was over. It was traumatic. (Or is it dramatic? I never figured out the difference between the two from my teenager years.)

Taylor and I were at a family barbecue, with plans to go to my sister's birthday dinner right after. We made plans not to eat too much at the first event, so we'd have room to enjoy the next party. That was the agreement: do not overeat.

As I watched my husband pack down his plate of chicken, and then chips, and finally a couple of rolls, tears began filling my eyes. I allowed myself to explore all the heartbreaking outcomes of his meal decision. What if we drove all the way to my sister's party and he wasn't able to eat anything? What if he sat around being sad while we binged on cake around him? What if this turned out to be a miserable experience on a big milestone in my sister's life?!

A man who can't enjoy his dinner is enough to make a grown woman cry. A pregnant one, that is.

6. The garbage bins.

I can see you nodding in agreement. Yes, the garbage bins are something to cry over, aren't they?

Well, honestly, this is perhaps the most embarrassing thing that's happened so far. I heard a strange, rumbling sound from outside my house. I didn't dare venture out in the daylight to figure out what it was, though. Pregnancy has made me into a grumpy, frumpy hermit. It's a good thing, since it keeps me from showcasing my everyday PJ attire to my neighbors.

As the rumbling grew closer, it occurred to me that it was Friday morning. Friday morning is important. It's when the garbage man comes.

I needed that garbage man to take out this trash because I had forgotten last week's trash. Judging by the sound of the truck engine, I knew I probably had enough time to run the 5 feet that is my driveway and present my overfilled can to the curb.

But rather than yanking up my big girl panties in courage, I laid on the couch instead. And felt pathetic as I pondered my new life as a hermit living in a home built from milk cartons and Wheat Thin crumbs.

Pregnancy hormones do weird, weird things to us ladies. (Especially revolving around food.)

Now that I've laid out my emotional dirt on the Internet, it's your turn! What's the most unusual thing you've cried over?
You definitely need this pregnancy humor in your life. Those crazy pregnancy hormones make you super-emotional over the oddest things. Crying over something as silly as a burrito is definitely not funny at the time, but in retrospect? Well, you be the judge of that. #pregnanthumor #pregnancyhormones #pregnancytruths #funny #crying

You definitely need this pregnancy humor in your life. Those crazy pregnancy hormones make you super-emotional over the oddest things. Crying over something as silly as a burrito is definitely not funny at the time, but in retrospect? Well, you be the judge of that. #pregnanthumor #pregnancyhormones #pregnancytruths #funny #crying

About the Author:
Chaun Jacobs is a pastries-eating enthusiast, writer, and usually has her camera bag by her side. You can usually find her over at the Hiccups and Pastries blog. If she's not there, then she's definitely in the pantry, fishing for snacks. Chaun currently lives in Salt Lake City, Utah with her family and imaginary cats. Find her on Facebook here.

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Moderate Mum said...

My favourite worst crying moment was I once cried in Habitat, which is an up market home furnishings store, because 'everything was so pretty and I would never be able to afford it'. I wasn't even pregnant so no excuse.

AnneMarie said...

Haha, so I did not have many "hormonal moments" when I was pregnant, but there was one of note within the first couple months of pregnancy. I was planning to attend a fancy dinner at church in the evening for the women of the parish, and somehow I ran into the gate at the exit for our apartment complex (our car was fine, as was the gate). Because it took so long for the gate-which would refuse to completely open or close-to get back in working order, I couldn't go to the dinner and eat all of the delicious food that I had been looking forward to. So, I start pulling out ingredients to make myself some peanut butter cookies, and for no reason at all, I start crying. Huge tears are rolling down my cheeks, and my husband was a little concerned. "Are you okay? What's wrong?" "I JUST WANT TO MAKE COOKIES!" I sobbed, waving my hand in the air. "Don't worry about me, it's just pregnancy hormones." "Oh right, I forgot about those..." he muttered before walking away. It was pretty hilarious :P

Jenny Evans said...

I would advise you never to see Pursuit of Happyness. It will have you weeping in empathetic despair over what it's like to have no money. It about did me in when we were a poor college student family!

Unknown said...

I totally cried at that teacher's letter too, and I'm not pregnant! It was so sweet.

Katy said...

I'm crying out of self-pity that I never had a teacher as cool as the one that wrote that letter! :)

Chaun said...

Cookies are no laughing matter! Actually, food in general is a emotional issue when pregnant. I totally relate right now. ;)

Chaun said...

Right? Teachers are some special mentors in kid's lives :)

Chaun said...

But really though, it would have been so great to get a letter like that! I maybe wouldn't have spazzed so much over the ACT :)

PurpleSlob said...

I laughed out loud several times during this post.
AFTER I quit freaking out that Jenny was announcing she was pregnant again!!
"WHAT???? She JUST had him!!"

The Lady Okie said...

Forgetting the trash is serious business. Especially when it's 90 degrees and you have two full-sized bags of dirty diapers sitting in there. Not that I would know...

Chaun said...

It wasn't one of my prouder moments. Glad to hear that I'm (not) alone in forgetting to take out the baby's dirty deeds. ;)

Chaun said...

Ha! This comment made me laugh out loud. If Jenny has super fertilizer genes like I do though, then we can expect another announcement fairly soon :)

Anonymous said...

Oh Chaun you are the funniest! When I was pregnant with your cousin Case I was standing in the kitchen looking in the fridge for something. Apparently it was garbage day for us as we had a big sack sitting there waiting for someone (cough Darren) to take it out. Well there was a fly that was bugging me so I grabbed a paper to shoo it away from me and manage to squish it right into the open garbage bag. The smeared fly guts instantly triggered some pregnancy vomiting which triggered some massive tears. So Darren runs out from the bedroom to see what in the world was going on and asks, "what happened?". I'm still puking into the garbage sack "I" puke, sob cry "squished" more tears and puking "a" gag gag cry "fly!" More of the same...which evolved into puking crying and laughing.