But it also comes with a very specific set of knowledge.
If you're a mother, you know...
- The location of every restroom in every store you have ever visited.
- That pee is sterile.
- What pennies being dropped into the upstairs toilet sounds like.
- That it's possible to love someone with all your heart and still call them by the wrong name 60% of the time.
- Never to make eye contact with a small child while rocking them to sleep. Ever.
- That getting ready for a spontaneous afternoon out takes the same amount of time as packing up for a move to France.
- Exactly how many minutes are left until naptime.
- And bedtime.
- That the price of doing jumping jacks is changing into a new pair of underwear.
- That the car carts at the grocery store are a hernia just waiting to happen.
- Just how disturbing most fairy tales and nursery rhymes actually are.
- The whereabouts of at least 8 single socks scattered around the house.
- That kids can actually will themselves to throw up if you try to make them eat against their wishes.
- What your preschooler's face looks like when she is exactly 5 seconds away from pooping her pants.
- How to nap while covering both your face and your groin at the same time.
- The names and backstories of way too many animated talking animals.
- That child ears are tuned to the frequency of a candy bar being unwrapped.
- How to "read" a 14-minute picture book out loud in 4 minutes, 37 seconds.
- That the roads in hell will be paved with clear Legos.
While we're on the subject of things all moms know, I probably don't have to tell you that your kids have broken something and/or made a giant mess while you've been reading this.
Because you already knew that, didn't you?