Friday, May 20, 2016

7 Quick Takes about Tips for CIA Operatives, Career Moves, and Things Not to Buy If You're a Nudist

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! That's the last 7 days in 7 quick takes. How was your week?

1


Over the past week, I've discovered what might be a really effective form of torture. In Phase One, you subject your victim to several successive nights of sleep deprivation.

When they're good and tired to the point of hallucinations, it's time to move on to Phase Two: making them try to line up the snaps on the sleeper of a screaming baby at 2 AM.

Repeat every night.

I swear, if my baby were doing this as a form of "enhanced interrogation," I would've cracked and told him anything he wanted to know days ago.

Unfortunately he doesn't want information, he just wants milk and to never be put down, ever.

2


We've had good days and bad days, so I really don't know what to say when someone asks "How's it going with the baby so far?"

Some days I feel fine, and other days I'm so exhausted I can feel my body shutting down all nonessential functions (vocabulary, ability to count, etc.)

I'll tell you what, though, I don't trust people who say after the third baby it's no big deal to add more. It's a deal. It is definitely at least a medium-sized deal.

3


In a turn of events that is still sort of puzzling even to us, Phillip decided to get a new job. (We like to group all our major life changes together on the calendar for maximum stress.) He signed the offer on Monday and is really excited about it. He'll even have a better commute.

The funny part is that just after he applied to this new job, he noticed that a woman on our church's email list had an address with that company. He asked if she worked there, and she replied that she did and he could call her to talk about the company if he wanted to.

Then he Googled her and it turns out she was being modest. Not only does she work there, she's the director. We had no idea.

4


Since I spend entirely too much time on the computer using a dining room table chair that can't be good for my posture, my dad and stepmom got me a proper desk chair for my upcoming birthday.

We were researching various kinds of office furniture and decided on this fine model:

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}

It got really good reviews, even from this guy:

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}


The emoji at the end of his second point really made my purchase decision for me, I think.

5


Did you know they make chocolate Twizzlers?

They don't really taste like chocolate. More like Cocoa Puffs. And then they've got the chewy Twizzler consistency.

So basically they're as natural as picking the cacao pods right off the tree. I think I'll be eating them for the health benefits, much like it's good for you to eat a square of unsweetened dark chocolate a day.

6


Our babies are always born with a lot of hair, and it's usually a little longer in the back than at the top.

At first it's not that noticeable, but eventually there always comes a day when the light hits just right and we realize the truth: our baby has a mullet.

Or, as my brother-in-law likes to call it, "business in the front, party in the back." That day has come.

7


We went on a walk and about a quarter mile from home, my daughter had a big visit from the bloody nose fairy. Normally that would be no problem, but I'd forgotten the cardinal rule of parenting (perhaps the cardinal rule of life) which is: never go anywhere without baby wipes.

I don't care if your kids have been out of diapers for a decade, you should still have a package of wipes in your purse or car. You just never know when you're going to need them.

Other than their intended purpose, how have YOU used baby wipes to save the day?

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21 comments:

  1. I think adding any amount of kids to any family is at least a medium sized deal. There's always adjustments made. I sure hope mine sleeps a little better than yours when he gets here though...

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    1. For your sake, I hope so too! (If not, though, you can call me at 4 AM to chat. I'll be up.)

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  2. Oh my, I lost it with #4. That is hilarious!!!! Congratulations to your husband on the new job! That's super exciting! (also, if you group big life changes and events and stress together, does it mean that you take care of everything stressful at once, so that you have nice long stretches of stress-free, mundane life?)

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    1. Theoretically it seems like that's how it should work...

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  3. I have one word for you: gowns. No snaps at 2 am. I have explained this to my kids who wonder why I put a boy in a dress. "Because I can't do snaps at 2 am." I am thinking you need your oldest to do a little more practice babysitting while you sleep. I think that was the biggest reason my later babies were so much easier.

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    1. You know what? You're a genius. I have a big stack of infant gowns but I think they're in a box marked "girl" in the attic. I'm going up there right now to find it!

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  4. Why don't more reviews cater for the nudist community. It's so infuriating.

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    1. I know, we are marginalizing an entire segment of society here!

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  5. Haha about the review! Hilarious. I like your chair though.

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  6. Well done to Phillip on the new job and hope all goes well for him. Sleep deprivation is awful isn't it - definitely a form of torture. Hope you start getting more sleep soon. I've done a similar thing with going out without wipes and my eldest fell over and ended up with a cut lip and blood everywhere. Definitely won't be making that mistake again but so easy to do!

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  7. The snaps are the meanest thing ever. I cried more than once because I was too tired to figure them out. If we have another kid, they'll only be in zip-up sleepers. I saw a "baby must have" (eye roll) post a few weeks ago, and the mom actually RECOMMENDED snaps because the zippers were too hard at night. I reread it several times to make sure that's actually what she said. I still can't make sense of it.

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    1. What? I'm sure she was sleep deprived when she wrote that post and had no idea what she was saying.

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  8. Baby mullets!!! bwahahaha!!
    Jenny, I'm so sorry. I'm sure he will start sleeping thru the night soon. Right about the time your next baby is born?! I'm sorry, was that too cruel?
    Infant gowns all the way!!
    A new job!! That's great! Hopefully your stressful events have hit their quota for 2016!!

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    1. That's okay. At this point the nurses at the hospital wave us off when we're discharged and say, "See you in a few years!" (That actually happened.)

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  9. Baby wipes get random stains out clothes (which you always notice AFTER you get somewhere - like church), crayon off of church pews, (washable?) marker off skin, and other things I can't think of right now. My mom used them a lot, so I do too. They do no make a *great* kleenex, if you normally use every inch of the kleenex like I do - but they are softer and gentler and don't make the area around the nose chapped... maybe this one is a toss up.

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    1. I love them for wiping up faces that have food/dirt all over them (which you also never notice until AFTER you get somewhere!)

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  10. I'm always really proud of myself for having cloth wipes in my purse at all times (we cloth diaper so it's just easier to use cloth wipes, too) - they've come in handy for many scraped knees, drippy noses, preschoolers who suddenly need to pee in the grass at the playground when there's no toilet anywhere (and they're GIRLS so they have to actually be wiped...)!

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    1. No end to the uses for baby wipes. And I will say that it's a billion times easier to have a boy pee outside!

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  11. Oh my goodness, you made me laugh so hard! Congrats on the new little guy, I haven't checked in with 7QT for weeks and I am finally caught up! It is a bummer that your new desk chair is not comfortable for all those nude office-workers out there...too funny. And I totally agree with the baby wipe thing. Those things are THE BEST!

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  12. Well as long as you don't sit in the chair naked all should be well right? Make sure to pass that information onto the children. It might be helpful :)

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  13. Nudists!!! I love online reviews. People are awesome.

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