Friday, August 2, 2019

7 Quick Takes about Alternative Superhero Origin Stories, Things You Can Never Wear If You Lived Through the 90s, and that Moment When Your Instant Pot Tells You You're a Bad Cook

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?

1


My 11-year-old got a book called Backyard Ballistics for Christmas (don't worry, the gift-giver cleared it with us first) and he's been plotting something with Phillip.

I don't really know what they're building, but a lot of suspicious packages with coils and pipes have been arriving at the house. They assured me they weren't making a bomb, and I think that's really all I want to know about what they're doing.

Their latest purchase was this gigantic red detonation button, which seemed like a funny and yet awesome thing you can just buy.

Sit down and enjoy a laugh at this week's 7 Quick Takes. If you want stories about big family chaos, cooking fails, things being broken, and funny things kids say, you've come to the right place. #7quicktakes #7qt #unremarkablefiles #funny #laughing #real

2


The other day in the dining room, one of the kids saw a spider on a thread of silk out of the corner of their eye, and you know how sometimes you think you see weird things in your peripheral vision? This kid thought the spider was flying.

So of course the others jumped right on that idea, yelling "It's Man-Spider!"

Man-Spider, of course, is the inverse opposite of Spider-Man: a normal spider that got superpowers when it was bitten by a radioactive man.

My kids are so weird.

3


We heard this song in the car on the way to 4th of July fireworks and even though we only heard it once a month ago, it will never again leave any of our heads, ever.


I'm sorry to do that to you, but if I'm going to be singing it under my breath then you have to be, too.

FYI, my kids like to parody this nonsensical ditty by singing it with the words changed to "My brain goes dot dot dot..."

4


So... what the heck is going on? Scruchies are back in?

I'm sorry, but when I see someone wearing a scrunchie, my brain automatically gives them bangs and a bad perm, even if they have neither (and they usually don't.) Having grown up in the 90s, the stigma attached to the scrunchie is too strong. It's physically impossible for me not to smirk when I see a young person earnestly wearing a scrunchie.

And now Champion is cool? I begged my mom for a Champion sweatshirt in the 9th grade. Begged. (Ironically, during a recent purge of my closet I just threw it away. Darn!)

Also, overalls...? My teen even tells me that sometimes people wear them with one strap undone. I want to grab everyone in her generation by the collar and say, "You didn't invent that! We did! Me and your mom and all of our friends! And it was a really bad idea!"

Teens today dress like I dressed in middle school; I fail to understand what the appeal is in dressing like your mom when she was 12.

Of course, being a young mom (I had my oldest when I was 21) that means most teenagers' parents are 10 years older than me and therefore missed that fashion train when it went around the first time. Is that why I'm having such a hard time with this?

5


Three of my kids are currently taking swimming lessons. Optimistic that scheduling a morning lesson would get us up and out of the house, I signed up for the 9 AM time slot which proved to be a really bad idea.

We're usually rushing in there late with me yelling at everyone to hurry up, and since my 5-year-old has had a rough time joining his class without tears I wanted to try extra-hard to get there ahead of time. That way, he wouldn't be stressed by me badgering him to hurry and he'd have a few minutes to sit and get acclimated before class starts.

On the drive there, we were looking good and scheduled to arrive at least 10 minutes before the start time. When we stopped at a red light, the 5-year-old asked from the backseat, "Are we late?"

"No," I said, feeling quite superior. "We're early!"

He paused and then asked, dead-serious, "What does 'early' mean?"

6


Our dishwasher broke. Even when we had a dishwasher, I felt like washing dishes was all I did. Now it really is.

I suppose if it was going to start smoking and trip the breaker, this week is probably the best week because at least the two oldest girls are away at camp and are therefore not eating here.

At this point, I'm assessing the value of all family members solely in terms of how many dirty dishes they create for me.

7


About 7 months ago, I got an Instant Pot. Initially I was scared it was going to blow up every time I touched it, but now I love it. I use it all the time because it makes dinner prep so easy.

That said, I guess nothing can completely compensate for my cooking skills.

Sit down and enjoy a laugh at this week's 7 Quick Takes. If you want stories about big family chaos, cooking fails, things being broken, and funny things kids say, you've come to the right place. #7quicktakes #7qt #unremarkablefiles #funny #laughing #real
If anyone can burn things in an Instant Pot, I can.

I didn't even know it could say that.

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9 comments:

Ann-Marie Ulczynski said...

Glad to see that you are not kidnapped! My instant pot tells me "burn" all the time, and I say a few choice words back to it :) Who needs a dishwasher? aren't that what children are for? Have a great week!

Rachel said...

Scrunchies are a "no" from me. I don't think they even work all that well for actually holding up a ponytail...don't you need to use a normal ponytail holder and then a scrunchie, and then that's just too complicated.
Overalls, though, I have a soft spot for, and if I lived somewhere that wasn't super hot all the time, I would probably have a pair. Granted, I come from a family that was all farmers back in the day and still thinks it's normal to spend all your free time in the summer haying fields with 60 year old tractors...so I may come by the love for overalls naturally. Ahhh...fond childhood memories of chasing wild turkeys out of the garden while brandishing a pitchfork...the good old days.

Jenny in WV said...

I love scrunchies! I'm wearing one right now! I have fairly long hair and usually use scrunchies to put my wet hair in a bun.
I have neither a perm nor bangs. The last time I had a perm (mid 90s/junior high) I was trying to grow my bangs out and usually wore headbands.
Overalls tho, are a trend I will not be returning to.

Diana Dye said...

I bought my 10 year old a scrunchie to be funny (I was surprised they were in stores.) She needed something to hold her hair back while sleeping. She started wearing them while awake and I about recommended she not but then noticed she was not the only one.

When she asks for colored socks to match each of her shirts for back to school, I will put my foot down.

Janice Richardson said...

My mind year old asked yesterday if I'd teach her to make scrunchies. I have many memories of making them with my sister! Fashion is so funny how it cycles.
What are some of your favorite instapot recipes? I feel like I'm underutilizing mine and would love some ideas!

Jenny Evans said...

Janice: my all-time favorite is probably this one (instant pot summer soup)
https://pinchofyum.com/instant-pot-summer-soup

I could eat it every day!

Marcia Miral said...

Gosh, I can completely relate to #6 (we don't have a dishwasher). It seems that I have barely washed the breakfast dishes, then it is time to cook lunch! Actually, dishes can be easy when you consider the pots and pans that you also have to wash and dry :(.

I read somewhere a long time ago that it is good to pray the petition part of your daily prayers while washing the dishes. It makes sense, I guess, because both take a long time to do :).

Unknown said...

I read dad the bit about the detonation button. His comment was "see I raised my boys right"

Janice Richardson said...

Thanks!