7 Quick Takes about College Move-Ins, Ways to Get People To Be Nicer to You, and Staying Motivated When the Going Gets Tough

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week? 

—1—

Last week I talked about how ridiculously well-behaved my 2-year-old nephew is, whose family was staying at our house. He's absolutely obsessed with cars, so when I interrupted him playing with matchbox cars to tell him it was time to eat, he predictably said "No!"

"Time to put your cars away and eat dinner," I repeated enthusiastically, but he didn't budge.

"No!" he yelled again. But he couldn't even be bad without being good.

With an emphatic "NO!" he threw the car in his right hand in the toy bin. With another "NO!" he threw the one in his left hand. And then he took my hand to go downstairs.

However, as time went on I did see a few legitimate temper tantrums (like when we went sightseeing and his did wouldn't let him throw his favorite toy into Niagara Falls) and he also bit his siblings a few times. So that evens it out.

—2—

The day after my brother- and sister-in-law and their kids went home, I got on a plane with my 18-year-old son to drop him off at college.

There was a free arcade in the terminal (I won 2 out of 3 games of two-player Tetris) and then we watched a thunderstorm underneath us from the plane window.

It felt like that scene in James and the Giant Peach when they're floating through the rainstorm.

—3—

Moving a son into college is way different than moving in daughters. My two girls didn't have the kind of dorm rooms you see on Instagram, not even close, but they did think hard about every single item they brought. And they just had a lot more than my son did.

We brought all of his belongings to his dorm in two trips from the car, each time passing girl parents on the sidewalk carrying fuzzy ottomans and full-length mirrors and potted plants and cute pillows and air filters. We moved him in quickly, then went out to lunch and the whole thing was just... enjoyable. The most time-consuming part of the whole move-in process was probably setting up his wi-fi router.

—4—

My son's wi-fi network is named Rocky,. Can you guess why?

This is his router. Amaze, amaze.

—5—

At Target, our cashier accidentally dropped something we bought. "Sorry, it's my first day," he apologized.

When I told him he was doing great, he laughed and said "Good, because I've actually been working here for years."

It's kind of like when I leave the 'Student Driver' magnet on the car and suddenly everyone on the road is nicer to me. I think it's a valid strategy.

—6—

When i'm not moving my adult children into their college places (my 22-year-old daughter is next) I've been playing with more toddler nieces and nephews. It's been so much fun.

I'm staying with my in-laws, who babysit several days a week. It's been so nice to play pretend, make someone laugh with silly noises, and read books about farm animals again. 

My nephew is 1 and he's found an alternative to crawling: sitting up and using his heels to scoot everywhere on his butt. It looks silly, but when you think about it, crawling seems inferior because you can't hold stuff while you're doing it. 

With the butt-scoot method, he gets where he needs to go with a cracker in each hand and abs of steel. Velcro a Swiffer pad to that kid's pants and it's a win-win-win situation.

—7—

I'd like to end with an inspirational thought from my 12-year-old. 

He sometimes likes to join me when I work out, and the last workout we did together was a tough one. He was struggling with 15 seconds left on the timer so I tried to encourage him by saying, "When it gets to this point, I like to tell myself 'I can do anything for 15 seconds.'"

"You can't fly for 15 seconds," he replied. So remember that when life gets hard.

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7 Quick Takes about Not Being Prepared, Headless Cautionary Signs, and Waterfall Overload

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday Saturday! How was your week? 

—1—

This week we more or less successfully completed a multi-state, multi-family road trip with Phillip’s parents and one of his brothers and his family. I’ll spare you all the convoluted details, but trust me, it had a lot of moving parts and little kids to keep track of.

“Are you nervous?” my mother-in-law asked me the day before she flew out here to begin the trip.

“Nervous about what?” I asked. I’d been working so hard to get my college freshman ready to move in, getting the younger kids’ school supplies, figure out my seminary teacher calling before it starts, and getting the house ready for my family to stay here, I’d only spent a grand total of about 15 seconds thinking about actually being on the trip. I just didn’t have time to get that far.

So it was no surprise to me when we had to turn around and go back for our passports 20 minutes into the first leg of the drive. That was exactly the level of preparedness we were bringing to the table.

—2—

I’ve already done this trip and seen these sights before, but I’ve really enjoying spending time getting to know my brother-in-law’s kids, who are 11, 8, and 2 years old. They are unbelievably sweet, and I don’t mean that in a figurative way. I mean it literally.

“Are you even real?” I asked the 2-year-old suspiciously at the hotel breakfast on our first morning together. He was independently spoon-feeding himself a bowl of Cheerios with milk, without a bib or high chair, and his clothes were spotless. I watched as he conscientiously leaned over his bowl for each bite, and wiped his chin with his spoon afterward to catch any milk dribbles. 

For comparison’s sake, when my kids were the same age they ate meals stripped down to a diaper so they’d be easier to clean, and it still took a while to get all the food out of their eyebrows.

As I was contemplating whether or not we were actually related to this clean child, my nephew squealed and pointed at a fly that had landed on our table. My 10-year-old went to slap it, splashing a puddle of my 12-year-old’s spilled orange juice everywhere.

Forget about being on the same family tree, we may not even be on the same evolutionary tree.

—3—

Our first stop on the trip was to visit some church history sites in New York, the place of the restoration of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. (More on that here if you want to 

We saw the farm where most of the Book of Mormon was translated, the hone where the prophet Joseph Smith lived, and the woods where he went to pray and saw God and Jesus Christ. My 10-year-old climbed all the trees there. 

We also went to the shop where the first copies of the Book of Mormon were printed, and also to the hill where the original Book of Mormon plates were found. 

And then, even though it’s not a historical site (it was built in 2000), we took pictures outside the Palmyra temple.

—4—

After we finished with church history sites, we headed back toward home with a stop at Niagara Falls on the way back.

We rode on the Maid of the Mist and were the very first group to board the not-very-crowded boat, so we got prime viewing at the front. Hopefully the other people on the ship didn’t mind us all whooping and cheering to make the 2-year-old think that getting pummeled by the pounding spray was fun and not scary.

I couldn't get it all in the frame, but this rainbow was so visible we could see it curve downward into the water, looking more like a ¾ circle than an arc. If there was a pot of gold at the end, I would have seen it for sure.

When we went to Niagara 8 years ago, our youngest child got a stuffed duck wearing a Maid of the Mist poncho. It became his favorite stuffed animal, which meant that ducks became his favorite animal, and now he owns a hundred duck stuffies and paraphernalia. We had no idea we were building a core part of his personality, but parenting is like that. 

So we checked in the gift shop before we left for Ducky's brothers and sisters, and they were still there! They were also selling sloths wearing ponchos, and knowing what we know now we got the heck out of there before someone could imprint on the sloth stuffy and alter the trajectory of their entire life.

We did get a ducky Christmas ornament, though.

Stuffed ducky is looking a little threadbare these days, but this guy can stay with us forever.

—5—

At Niagara, the 10-year-old pointed out this sign and asked, “Why don’t any of the people have heads?”

I told him I didn't know and forgot all about it, until that night when I saw another headless sign at our hotel!

“Why don’t any of those people have heads?! What’s wrong with this place?” I exclaimed. This time, he was the one who had no answer.

—6—

That night, we went to a Hibachi grill for dinner. While we were entertained by the chef’s show (although our group was so big he only had time for a teeny bit of spatula-flipping and food-throwing), my 2-year-old nephew was busy playing with the brightly-lit claw machines nearby. 

We didn't put any money in it, but that didn't prevent him from having a great time. He thought he was playing a video game, reinforced by the fact that every time he looked at us we all clapped and told him he was winning the game.

My 10-year-old, though, actually did win the game. Twice. Grandpa gave him some money and he got toys out of there 2 of the 4 times he tried! I have never in my life seen or heard of anyone winning anything from a claw machine. It was weird.

—7—

Our last stop before going home was Watkins Glen State Park. My brother-in-law said it was the #3 state park in the U.S. as far as bang for your buck (scenery per square mile) and he was NOT kidding. 

We did the gorge trail, and it was like this basically the entire way down. One a half miles straight of beautiful scenery and beautiful cliff faces and beautiful waterfalls. I can't hardly even describe it.

There were just so, so many waterfalls. I think the official count is 19, and the way they organized the trails was brilliant because you went over some and under others and even behind a couple of them which was really cool. I walked part of the way with my 2-year-old nephew and he kept yelling "'Nother one waterfall! 'Nother one waterfall!" It was a really great end to the trip. 

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The Educational Summer Vacation: Studying the Dominican Republic

At the beginning of the summer, my two youngest kids (ages 10 and 12) picked a few countries to spend a week learning about! We've been doing this for years, and I can't tell you how many times my kids answer a tricky trivia question or wow their friends with an obscure fact that they learned "from doing countries." It's also very cool to have them exposed to more than what they see in our neighborhood and at school.

This week my 10-year-old picked the Dominican Republic. The Dominican Republic is half of an island called Hispaniola; the other half is Haiti. They're pretty different even though they're right together, but I guess that's another story for another week.

There are affiliate links in this post. If you click them and buy something, the cost stays the same to you but I will receive a small commission for referring you. Thanks!

Monday

We started like always, finding the Dominican Republic on our wall map and drawing the country's flag.

The flag was adopted in 1844. The red and blue are from Haiti, which once occupied it. The white cross is the symbol of peace, and the Bible on the crest is open to the verse "and truth shall make you free."

In previous years the kids would have also filled out a page of their passports, but I guess mine are too old and cool to do that anymore. Here are free printable ones if yours are not.

This dramatic video introduced the kids to the natural beauty of the Dominican Republic and life there:

 

The country is not without its problems, though. There's a lot of poverty. And tropical storms and hurricanes also plague DR, not just by causing damage and injury, but by washing tons of garbage onto the beaches. (Here's a really short clip of the garbage on Montesinos Beach after Tropical Storm Beryl in 2018.)

Another thing that the Dominican Republic is known for? Baseball. Ten percent of the players in the MLB are from the DR, which is pretty wild if you think about it. We read in a library book called Home Run Kings about one of the most famous, Sammy Sosa, whose name even I know (even though I can't usually remember which sport is the Superbowl and which one is the World Series.)

One of the most popular pastimes in the Dominican Republic is dominoes. We have a double-12 set that we play often, but I think the version we always play is called Mexican Train. We learned how to play by Dominican rules, pared down our dominoes set, and played a few rounds.

The kids thought it was okay but they missed the rules we usually play by. They're creatures of habit.

To end the day, I gave them a few books by Julia Alvarez that had to do with the Dominican Republic:

• How Tia Lola Came to Stay (fiction, ages 8-12)
• Before We were Free (YA novel for grades 7+)

Tuesday 

This 3-minute introduction to the history of the Dominican Republic was just right for the attention spans of my 10- and 12-year-old.

The Dominican Republic was originally populated by the Taíno people, who left behind rock paintings you can see today in numerous tourist sites, like those in Cueva de las Maravillas. We looked up information about the rock paintings (careful, there are probably some you want to skip discussing with your kids.)

After Christopher Columbus discovered the island and named it Hispaniola ("little Spain") in 1942, the natives were taken advantage of and kind of wiped out. Most people who live in DR today are descended from Spanish colonizers or the African slaves who they brought there.

The Dominican Republic gained independence in 1844, but remnants of Spanish colonization remain. In fact, the disputed grave of Christopher Columbus is on the island. We watched this video tour of Faro a Colón ("Columbus Lighthouse") and talked about where each of us thought his bones really ended up, in Spain or in the Dominican Republic:

Then we learned about Fortaleza Ozama, a Spanish fortress from 1505 with 6-foot thick walls. We checked out this post with pictures, and then the kids designed an ultimate protection fortress of their own creation.

I'm not totally convinced that my 12-year-old knows who M.C. Hammer is, but he named this hammer-shaped fortress after him so I guess that's something:

Guarded by robotic soldiers and something called a "black hole launcher." Sounds terrifying.

My 10-year-old wasn't to be outdone, though, and built a tower connected to the moon that was protected by lightning rods, pressure-activated missile launchers, and a pool of lava that could also blast off into space and then self-destruct in case someone managed to infiltrate it.

I hope neither of these kids work in defense when they grow up. They're both insane.

Wednesday

Did you know that a lot of Spanish words come from Arawak, the language of the Taíno people (for example, iguana comes from an Arawak word meaning "big lizard.")

We listened to this song from Calico Spanish about farm animals and their noises (I think it would have been fun to sing and dance to it as suggested, but those days are gone for my big kids) and then they filled out this AI-generated worksheet:

We also wanted to explore the music of the Dominican Republic. We learned how to dance merengue, and for days afterward my kids were laughing and saying "Speed that thang up" in a robot voice like in this video:

We read picture book called Angélica and la Güira, and then we decided to make one ourselves. (I'd always heard it called a güiro, so I looked it up: a güira is made of metal and a güiro is made of wood. So there you go.) 

I'm not a crafty person, but this tutorial was absolutely my kind of craft. You literally take a tin can or a plastic water bottle with ridges, and run a pencil across it to make a percussion sound. We played them to a merengue video. 

Bachata is another musical style also from the Dominican Republic. We listened to this playlist to hear the sound of it, but if your kids are actually Spanish-speaking you should probably pick another playlist with more appropriate lyrics.

Thursday

Every February, the Dominican Republic celebrates Canival with parades and costumed characters. It's a total party. Here are some of the standard characters you might see in a Carnival parade.

I started out the week with grand plans to make papier mache masks with the kids, but it's a little too complicated so it didn't happen... but it could for you!

Instead, we bought green plantains at the store and my husband followed this recipe to make a DR comfort food called mangu. It was pretty good! Especially since I didn't have to make it.

Friday

The Dominican Republic has some really fun animals. The solenodon (which looks like a shrew) is a venemous mammal only found on the islands of Hispaniola and Cuba. We watched this video to learn more about solendons.

The jaragua lizard, also found in DR, is the world's smallest lizard. It can fit on a dime. 

Also, humpback whales have chosen the waters around the Dominican Republic as a great place to get together during the winter breeding season, which makes it the best place in the world to go whale watching. 

I hope the videographers for this documentary on humpback whales got some kind of award for their work, because it was amazing. 

 

Afterward, I had the boys go outside and compare the lengths of each of those animals, from the 50-foot humpback whale to the 16mm jaragua lizard, in the driveway with a length of yarn. It kept them busy for a while, and tricked them into playing outside afterward when they ordinarily would've been inside reading or begging for video games.

Saturday

One more thing DR is known for is Dominican amber. It's fossilized tree resin from an extinct tree, and it's generally accepted as the most clear and beautiful kind of amber. Sometimes there are even fossilized insects or flowers inside.

I bought a bar of glycerin soap at the grocery store, and using this process from a library book called Dominican Republic by Mary Engler, the kids made "Dominican amber."

They melted down half of the glycerin soap bar in small containers, and inserted an artifact of their choice from the yard as it started to cool and harden.

The 10-year-old chose a leaf from a holly bush:

And the 12-year-old used an acorn from the yard:

It was a fun little craft, and a fun end to the week studying the Dominican Republic.

Remember how I said random knowledge from our weeks studying countries always pops up? Just after we'd finished our week in the Dominican Republic, I passed a semi on the freeway with a picture of the Dominican flag on the back. A week ago I would've wondered what country it was and had to Google it. You just never know when the things we learn are going to come in handy.

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7 Quick Takes about What You Might See When You Put Down Your Phone, Doing Blanket Math, and Eating Food Like a Star Wars Character

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week? 

—1—

The other day I was in the car with Phillip and our 12-year-old, and we decided to stop by the grocery store on our way home. Phillip was going to run in for something, and both of us were just going to wait in the car. I was doing something on my phone, when the 12-year-old was like, "Mom, look at the sky."

I looked out the window, saw nothing, and went back to my phone.

A few seconds later, he said, "Woah, Mom, did you see that?"

I looked up again just in time to catch a distant lightning storm lighting up the clouds in deep purples and pinks, and then go dark. It was far enough away that the sound didn't reach us at all, though. We got out of the car and sat on the hood watching the storm until it started to move away 5 or 10 minutes later, but it was a pretty cool experience.

It's not easy because so much of life is on our phones now (I wasn't just doomscrolling, I was checking my to-do list and scheduling an appointment for one of the kids), but when I can I should remember to put my phone down.

—2—

 

Our 22-year-old daughter received her mission call! In the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, young adults can apply to be missionaries and then they're assigned to a certain area of the world by church leadership. 

You can learn why I trust that the process of assigning missionaries to this or that place is an inspired process here and here (no dartboards involved), but one thing is clear: you yourself don't do the choosing.

Before she opened her mission call to find out where she'd be going, I had this conversation with the 10-year-old:

Me: Where do you think she'll go?

10yo: I don't know, it's random.

Me: It's not random. They do pray about it, you know.

10yo: Well, I wasn't included in that prayer so it's random to me.

We were all making guesses based on her language experience and her personality, and in the end when she opened her call and read it we were way off: she is going to Omaha, Nebraska! 

—3—

I took the 12-year-old with me to do some errands this week. Our first stop was picking up a bag of books that were on hold for us at the public library. Most of them were for the kids, so I pulled out mine (The Collapse of Parenting) and set it on the car seat so it didn't get mixed up with the kids' books.

Our next stop was at the dollar store to grab a few things. The 12-year-old said he'd rather stay in the car and read his newly-acquired books than come in with me, so I rolled down the windows and told him to come in if he started overheating.

And then, with The Collapse of Parenting sitting prominently visible in the front seat, I left my child alone in a hot car to go shopping.

I wonder if that's in the book.

—4—

In a few weeks we're having extended family come visit the area, and we offered for everyone to stay here. That means we will have 15 people in the house, and we do not have a big house.

We can do it, make no mistake about that. But it requires some complicated logistics, and it's not as simple as it sounds because we're going to be relocating some of our kids to give their beds to the guests and everyone's personal preferences have to be considered.

I put together a literal spreadsheet of blankets, pillows, and what surface everyone will be sleeping on to keep it straight and figure out if we need to buy anything.

—5—

Getting a young adult child ready for their first year of college is hard, particularly when you live in another state so you can't just load up all their stuff in the car and drop them off at the dorm on move-in day.

You have to buy plane tickets and then think about what to buy here (mostly clothes that they'll need to try on and make sure they like,) what to order and ship to Grandma and Grandpa who live near his college (thank goodness for Grandma and Grandpa, and for Amazon), and what to buy when you get there like toiletries.

Again, there's another spreadsheet.

Everything feels really rushed, especially since we're trying to get it done before our family comes into town so we can enjoy being with them. And when I say everything is last-minute, I mean everything. We just made an orthodontic appointment to get his braces off the day before he leaves for school.  

—6—

I'm also trying to learn the ropes for my new calling at church. I was asked to be the remote seminary teacher for our stake. Seminary, in our church, is for teenagers and it's an early-morning scripture study class every day before school. Ideally it's in-person at a physical building, but where we live in New England people are kind of spread-out so that doesn't logistically work for a number of kids, who can opt to do it online instead.

It's never been difficult for me to leave one calling for another before, but this was difficult for me. I loved working with the kids in Primary. Not only that, but I thought I was good at it and fulfilling a real need with talents that come naturally to me.

However, I don't think teaching seminary over Zoom taps any of my natural talents. I'm not a morning person, I'm not good at tech, and honestly I don't feel capable of teaching an engaging lesson over Zoom to tired teenagers at 6 AM (I'm not sure that anyone is, honestly.) But I suppose that's kind of the point. If you never did anything that stretched you, you'd have less reason to be on your knees asking God to help you figure it out every day.

Anyway, it's going to be a demanding calling. The amount of meetings and training I've already had dwarfs anything I've ever done in the church before, and I still don't feel like I know what I'm doing. Pray for me.

—7—

Last week for the Educational Summer Vacation, we learned about Malaysia and read a folk tale about a sneaky little mouse-deer who schemes his way to some fruit from the rambutan tree. 

As I looked at the illustrations I thought, "Hey, I've seen those at the grocery store before!" They're not there all the time so I didn't see them that week, but they had some this time so I brought them home.

Not the ripest things in the world, but beggars can't be choosers. Also, we live in New England, not Southeast Asia.

My kids love it when I serve them unfamiliar food that requires instructions on how in the world to eat it:

Actually, they were pretty excited to try these. My son said they looked like something you'd see in a funny scene from Star Wars when they ask for food on another planet and have no idea what to do with what they're given.

Cut, pop out the white fruit, and spit out the pit as you eat it.

In my opinion, they tasted a little like grapes. What's the weirdest thing you've ever eaten?

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7 Quick Takes about Rollerblading, Being in the Water But Not, and Living Room Parkour for No Discernible Reason

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week? 

—1—

Back-to-school shopping is easier now than it used to be. For one thing, the older three are adults now so I only have three school supply lists left to juggle. 

Also, the 14-year-old buys all her clothes on Depop on her own, all I have to do is sign off on the purchase and tell her to put it on my card.

That said, I do have two school supply lists staring up at me from the computer desk that I need to go through this weekend with the boys.

—2—

This week we didn't get much done, other than the unscheduled cleanup of a small tree that came down in our yard for no reason. But we did stay really busy with fun stuff.

On Tuesday we met up with a friend of my 10-year-old. It was their first playdate out of school and my first time meeting this friend and his family. They invited us to their neighborhood's private beach, and they were the most calm and gentle people. They're the kind of people I meet and think (1) I love being around them, and (2) I hope they aren't absolutely horrified being around us.

Their teenager came down to the beach for a little bit and had a full-on conversation with us, including full sentences and eye contact and everything. I think he may have been a cyborg.

—3—

On Wednesday I took the kids to a roller rink. We used to go a lot when my oldest was young, but fell out of the habit and the younger kids claimed that they'd never even gone before. 

One of the kids was ready to go about an hour before everyone else, but everyone else had fun. I used to rollerblade in college but haven't done it in about 10 years. It's kind of like riding a bike, but also kind of not. So I looked mostly competent with a few almost-falls when I lost my balance for no reason.

Also, they played a trap remix of the Barney theme song and I enjoyed it both ironically and unironically.

—4—

On Thursday we went swimming at this beautiful clear water lake that I just love, it's my favorite place and we absolutely have to go there at least once a summer.

It was such a humid day, just perfect for the beach. Stepping out of the car, the 22-year-old said, "This feels like being in the water... with none of the benefits of actually being in the water."

We discovered a sort of sandbar across the beach that we didn't know was there, probably because the other times we've been there, we didn't see people walking around on it and looking like Jesus performing a miracle from our point of view on the other shore.

—5—

On Friday, the whole family went hiking at a state park that I'd found at the beginning of the summer when making a list of things to do. It wasn't the kind of day you'd think would be great for a hike: it was 85 degrees and a million percent humidity. But Phillip had taken the day off work, we'd reserved a park pass ahead of time, and we were going no matter what.

Most of the 5-mile hike was in the shade, and there were wild blueberries (which I think might be illegal to eat in a state park, but I'm not sure about that), and truthfully, all of the kids did really well. I heard very little complaining, even though two of them had already done intense physical workouts (cross-country practice and gymnastics practice) earlier that morning.

Afterward, we went swimming at the beach area. That's where I saw this sign prohibiting portable speakers "or other noise producing devices" that would bother other people. Which I read as my kids raced whooping and screaming into the water.

Sign that may or may not ban my children from the lake, emphasis mine.

—6—

When no one can agree on what to watch for family movie night, the rule is that Mom and Dad get to introduce them to one of our favorite 90's movies. 

This week we watched Sister Act, and I have to say that it held up. You never know if you're going to put it on and spend half the time cringing and trying to communicate the following to your spouse with your eyes:

• I didn't remember that being in there
• I hope that part goes over the kids' heads
• This aged terribly and is incredibly _____ist
• Wow, I really did not remember that being in there

But none of that for Sister Act. Everyone enjoyed it, and Phillip and I didn't have to hold a debriefing about it afterwards, either.

—7—

Boys are funny. I remember thinking something was wrong with my first son when he was a preschooler, because I kept comparing him to his two older sisters. When they get excited, girls will run around and scream, but boys will straight-up punch a hole in the wall. They just have too much energy to be contained by their bodies, and honestly I'm not sure when that ends.

Yesterday, I was sitting on the couch with my 18-year-old son making a plan for college move-in. I asked him to go check something upstairs, so he bolted up, leapt over the living room couch with a deafening thud, and thundered up the steps three at a time. There are no words.

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7 Quick Takes about Bee Stings, Discovering the Best Ice Cream, and Cookies from the Emperor

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week? 

—1—

The 14-year-old got back from her church youth conference! The plan was to go visit church history sites in New York, where the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints was restored in 1830. (If you're not sure what that means, you can read more here.)

My daughter was skeptical. In fact, she was convinced it would be awful because the last time we went it was hot and she was grumpy “and the only good memory was staying in the car and eating a granola bar with Grandpa.” (This was when she was a preschooler, by the way.)

So I really didn’t  know how it was going to go this time. For all I knew, it could be worse: maybe her youth group leaders wouldn't even bring granola bars.

Well, this time she got stung by a bee while they were eating lunch and it gave her a huge, swollen cankle for the rest of the youth conference, so at least she made a new memory to treasure.

—2—

The 12-year-old was invited to a group that plays pick-up soccer in the next town over, and for the first game Phillip and I thought it would be fun to drop him off and then go have a date night together. 

We found a local ice cream place, and on the way there we were wondering if the 12-year-old would have a good time. It was mostly kids he didn't know, and in the few moments we'd stuck around we got the feeling that this particular group was going to take a while to find their rhythm.

Once we got to the creamery, we scanned the list of flavors on the wall and Phillip saw gluten-free salted caramel Oreo. Turning to me, he said, "It doesn't matter whether he likes it or not, he's going every week and we're coming here."

Phillip tries not to complain about being gluten-free, but honestly it sucks sometimes. Cookies and cream used to be his favorite ice cream before he knew that wheat made him feel like crap, and now not only can he not get cookies and cream when we go out, I can't get it either because I feel bad eating it in front of him.

—3—

For the last few months, I've been optimizing our credit card cashback strategy. And because I love sharing frugal tips with anyone who will listen, I'm going to share our strategy with you. 

If you're going to use any of this credit card advice, though, you have to promise me that you will never, ever carry a balance. Going into debt (even a teeny bit of debt for a short time) cancels out whatever you gain in cashback and is like flushing your money down the toilet. So if you don't plan to use credit cards just like you would cash, skip to the next Take and forget I ever said anything.

With that said, here's what cards I use to pay for everything in order to maximize our cashback:

(I personally have and use the cards I recommend here, but full disclosure, I do get a referral bonus if you sign up using some of these links.)

• Groceries, Entertainment, Dining, and Streaming: Capital One Savor Rewards - unlimited 3% on all of those things (if you can't get that one, American Express Blue is 3% on groceries and gas up to $6K each and 1% on everything else, so it's a great all-purpose card that even my college student got pre-approved for)
• Gas: Citi Custom Cash - 5% on $500 per month of your highest category spending (unfortunately you can't still apply for this but if you have another Citi card you can call to request a product change, which is what we did)
• Amazon: Prime Visa -  unlimited 5% on Amazon purchases
• Utilities and Internet: US Bank Cash+ Visa Signature - you can pick two 5% categories and those were the two that made sense for us
• Travel and Parking: TD Cash - you can choose 3% and 2% categories on up to $2K
• Everything Else: Wells Fargo Active Cash - unlimited 2% on everything
• Just In Case: Chase Freedom - 1% on everything with rotating quarterly 5% categories up to $1,500 (this is my very first card so I keep it for the longevity effect on my credit score; sometimes the 5% categories still come in handy)

Again, if you've read this list and you think you want to apply for any of these cards, put up your right hand and repeat after me: "I solemnly swear that I will only buy what I can afford, and pay my balance in full every month." Don't make me come over there.

—4—

We took a really nice family hike/walk over the weekend. (I never know what to call these: "hike" sounds like we're climbing a mountain with trekking poles and backpacks, but "walk" sounds like we're circling the block in a suburban neighborhood a couple of times. This is in between.)

I took this thinking "What an amazing nature shot!" but now that I see it here all I can think is "Heigh ho, heigh ho, it's off to work we go!"

—5—

Phillip hasn't been traveling this week, but I still haven't seen him very much. He's been very busy at work entertaining the emperor. At least that's what I think is funny to say when the kids ask where Dad is. The CIO of Phillip's company is in town, and my husband is the one showing him around and escorting him to work dinners and stuff.

It will be nice when this week is over so we can see more of Phillip again, but I don't really mind. It sounds like it's been a good visit, and he even brought us a tin of cookies from as a thank-you gift so long live the emperor.

—6—

I've finally started staining the inside of the French doors we had installed in our house a year ago. I've spent forever testing out different colors of stain and then procrastinating because I can't find the right color to match the rest of the woodwork in the house.

But done is better than perfect, so I started with the least visible door this week. 

Two coats in, and I'm pretty sure that the color isn't going to work. I have about 5 other stains in the basement from all the trial and error, so at this point I'm thinking about going rogue and just mixing some together to see what happens.

—7—

Besides the doors, I had a laundry list of other DIY projects that I wanted to complete before we have company staying at our house in August. But recently I realized they're coming in 2 weeks, and until then I'm going to be focusing on getting the 18-year-old ready for college move-in day so none of those other things are happening right now.

Hence my stress dream that the railing along the hallway to the guest bedroom splintered and broke apart, and I was freaking out thinking their baby was going to fall off and get hurt because they were coming in two days. Which hopefully doesn't happen.

(Also, I say "guest bedroom" like we're all fancy but we're not. We're kicking two of our kids out to sleep on the couch and giving our company their room.)

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