Friday, June 23, 2017

7 Quick Takes about Letting It Go, Signs That Someone You Love Is Building a Time Machine, and How to Part Your Hair in Preparation for World Domination

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?

1


What do you do when two of your kids had an argument, and it's basically over, but one of them just won't let it go?

Apparently, requiring that child to sing along to a karaoke video of Frozen's "Let It Go" we found on YouTube must not be the right answer because it didn't work very well.

After a stubborn refusal and a tense standoff, I even volunteered to sing it with the reluctant child, but it ended up being mostly me doing a solo and then the child stomping away.

Phillip pointed out the silver lining, though: "Well, I think they hated that almost more than having to sing it. Nice work!"

I'm no Idina Menzel, but I do what I can.

2


I usually bake bread once a week instead of buying it, but before you get too impressed let me tell you that I forget the salt about 20% of the time.

After telling me how good this week's bread was, my 5-year-old asked about last week's no-salt bread, "Can I call your gross bread 'gross?'"

"Well you can, but it's not really polite," I said. (We have regular conversations about how it's bad manners to broadcast your negative opinions about someone's cooking to the entire dinner table. REGULAR.)

"Okay," she nodded. "I'm just going to call it 'gross' then, because that's what it was."

When honesty comes up against manners with this girl, honesty wins.

3


For Father's Day this year the kids and I cleaned Phillip's car, which was sorely needed.

Phase 1 was clearing out the debris that had accumulated in there over the years (yes, I said years) which included two candy canes, a dreamcatcher, a mega-size canister of zip ties, rolls of wrapping paper, boy scout awards, assorted cords and gadgets we couldn't identify, a bent umbrella, about a million receipts from Home Depot, and a drywall trowel. As we were unloading all of this randomness from the car, my son asked, "Is dad building a time machine?"

And I thought I had a messy car.

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}
This is a nice dreamcatcher. Too bad Phillip didn't know where it came from or how it got in his car.

We threw out trash, vacuumed carpets, cleaned smoothie spills off the passenger seat (maybe for his birthday we'll get him a smoothie container with a lid,) washed all the windows, and polished the dashboard. By the time we were done, it looked like a new car.

As a reward, Phillip let the kids eat the candy canes they found.

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}
Hopefully these are from the most recent Christmas. If not, I don't want to know.

For Father's Day dinner I was going to make our favorite veggie burger recipe (spare me your vomiting noises, these are amazing) but somehow we'd run out of almost every ingredient. Even the hamburger buns had been ravaged by the kids, which I'm guessing had to do with the fact that no one wanted my salt-less bread.

4


When I say we buy everything on Amazon, I'm serious. I just ordered a bunch of rolls of Scotch tape from Amazon instead of picking them up at Walmart like a normal person.

I heart Amazon. Amazon completes me. I've never had an issue with them, which is amazing for how much I use them. But for the last week, packages have not been arriving at our house.

Earlier this week we ordered some batteries, and the delivery status on our order said "delivered; left in the mailroom." Thinking it meant the mailroom at the post office, I went there and they had no clue what I was talking about. Our package was nowhere.

And then a Nerf gun we ordered never arrived, even though the delivery status said "delivered."

What the heck. Amazon, we love you but are you on drugs??

Luckily, next to the delivery status there was a picture of our delivered packages and I recognized the surroundings. They were in the back corner of the house at a basement-level door we never, ever use. Without that picture, it could've been months before we found those packages.

From now on, I guess we'll have to start checking the ground outside the back door our "mailroom" for packages.

5


Phillip and I were watching TV when he leaned over to me and whispered, "That guy's part is on the wrong side."

"What?"

"His hair. It's parted on the wrong side."

I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about, but when I Googled it, it turns out that there sort of is a wrong side.

The "masculine" way to part hair is on the left, so much so that when they want a guy to be super-nerdy in the movies, they give him a right part. Clark Kent? Right part. Superman? Left.

Then I also learned that apparently, I'm a man.

When I started parting my hair on the left side years ago, little did I know that I was joining the ranks of Margaret Thatcher and Hillary Clinton in positioning myself to become one of the most powerful women in the world.

Between my right part and the fact that I've already drawn up my presidential platform, success is only a pantsuit away.

6


I still identify as a night owl, but as I get older, the definition of a "late night" changes. Even just a couple of years ago, I could stay up until 2 or 3 with no consequences. Now it's more like 11 or midnight.

Anyway, I stayed up until 3 one night this week. Predictably, I felt like garbage in the morning.

"I'm so stupid! I'm just too old to be doing this anymore!" I wailed to Phillip, who was supposed to feel sorry for me even though he clearly didn't. (Apparently when you have no one to blame but yourself, you're not entitled to the same sympathy or whatever.)

"Well," he said, "Traditionally I think people are supposed to start out young and stupid, and then they gradually become old and wise. Old and stupid is a problem."

I declined his offer to graph it out for me.

I now have an alarm set for 9:30 PM on my phone to remind me to go to bed. It's pretty worthless since turns off if I ignore it for 60 seconds, but luckily Phillip must have felt a little bit sorry for me after all, because he makes sure I go to bed when he does now.

7


Before the older kids finished the school year, I knew I wanted to take the littles on a day trip. I knew they'd all like it, especially my train-obsessed 3-year-old.

We got on the commuter train, rode to a stop just a few towns over, and went to a playground that's about a 10-minute walk from the station. We played and had lunch there before going back home. I was so glad we finally got around to doing it.

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}

And the 3-year-old? He actually wasn't going insane with enthusiasm during the train ride like I thought he would be, but I know he really liked it anyway because everything he did for the next 24 hours, he loudly let me know he didn't want to do because he'd rather be on the commuter train.

Also, now he asks me if we're taking a train every time we leave the house. I think I might end up regretting this.

And while it was refreshing to see a positive graffiti message scrawled across the wall of the train station, it would've been nice if they'd spelled it right.

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}
Just say no to female protagonists in literature, kids. 

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13 comments:

  1. Lol at least you have a new name for your basement: the mailroom!

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  2. Heroine. LOL. And you're kinda blowing my mind right now with the left/right part! I'm going to be noticing everybody's part now...

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    Replies
    1. I know, now I can't not look or care about people's hair parts!

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  3. I share your affection for Amazon. We had some issues recently when they use USPS to deliver, as the mail man would mark things as delivered, then get around to delivering them two or three days later. Or leave things in the parcel box, with the parcel box key locked inside THE PARCEL BOX. I think the local Postmaster started blocking my calls, and I even got a note from the letter carrier that he would "always take care" of us and that I didn't need to call his boss.

    Right now I am obsessed with Amazon Free same-day deliver. It's a problem. A $35-at-a-time problem.

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  4. Fun times at your house! Took my 3 year old granddaughter to a pioneer village with a "train" that runs around the park. Every time she saw it coming, she yelled, "Train!! Let's go!" and start running to catch it.

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  5. last night I saw "left in the mailroom" in the delivery status for an Amazon order. Found your blog while googling the problem. Talk about a timely post! No email or delivery location photo was sent to me, but an extra thorough search revealed the package stashed behind a large air conditioning unit, which shall henceforth be named "the mailroom".

    So thanks for helping to solve an issue that Amazon Customer Service couldn't seem to get a handle on. Love your blog!

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    Replies
    1. Glad I could be of service! I'm guessing the delivery guys have to pick from a pull-down menu saying where they left your package, and "in the mailroom" is the closest option to "stashed away in a random crevice near the house exterior where the homeowner will never, ever find it."

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  6. So funny about the candy canes! Also dying at the "gross" bread. Gotta love the honesty!

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  7. Jenny, thank you so much for sharing all the joy with us!!
    So, what happened to the mysterious dream catcher???

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    Replies
    1. My second daughter claimed it and now it's hanging on her bulletin board. Hopefully vengeful spirits from wherever it came from aren't going to haunt her now.

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  8. Dude, how in the world did I get through hair school without learning that about parts? My hair is parted on the left....hmm...

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    Replies
    1. It makes me feel a little better that they're not teaching that in hair school. One of my first thoughts was when my hair stylist is about to cut my hair and asks what side I usually part it on, she was probably screaming inside, "YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG!!!" Glad to know that was (probably) not the case.

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