Friday, June 17, 2016

7 Quick Takes about How to Drive a Perfectionist Crazy, Channeling My Inner King of Pop, and Times You Shouldn't Use Google Voice Search

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?

1


Our neighbor's son called us for a favor, explaining that he was supposed to bring a music stand to his band concert that night but he'd broken his, and could he please borrow my daughter's stand?

Well, of course! We're always happy to help.

I folded up her stand and set it by the door, and less than an hour later my 4-year-old literally snapped off the top part that holds the music. What followed was one of the most ironic phone calls I've ever had to make.

2


After calling my neighbor back, the next order of business was to replace our broken stand. Our old wire one always felt a little flimsy (so maybe it wasn't all my 4-year-old's fault) so I went with one that seemed a little beefier.

Looks great, right?

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}

Wrong.

Oh, it's fantastic at holding sheet music, but if you're a perfectionist your eyes are already watering from this glaring assault on all your sensibilities as a human being:

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}

For all you normal people who still don't see it, I'll do you a public service and just tell you that one row of holes doesn't line up with the rest of them! And once you see it you can't unsee it. I know, I've tried.

3


We also bought some new outdoor lights to put next to the garage doors to replace the dated ones that have been happily rusting there since 1995. We actually ordered seven of them, since we also have identical lights mounted outside the front door, back door, and along the deck.

Our credit card company immediately sent us a fraud alert. Not sure if it's because we bought 7 of them or because we don't buy nice stuff for our house so any home decor purchase sets off an alarm somewhere that our identity has definitely been stolen.

4


Despite spring cleaning our minivan, I found this under my son's car seat the other day:

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}
So... Christmas in July is meant literally, no?

This is why I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle.

5


When you put baby clothes in storage for a few years and then take them out again, a curious thing happens. Yellow spit-up stains that weren't there before are now really prominent.

I just got the 0-3 month hand-me-downs out of the attic for the baby (there came a point when even I had to admit he no longer fits in the size newborn clothes I kept jamming him into) and about half of them were looking pretty bad. I almost wondered if I should just throw them out.

But then I remembered reading about cleaning out baby poop stains on What's Up Fagans using sunshine, and I figured it was worth a try. I sprayed the worst ones with vinegar and laid them out on the deck.

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}

And the sun is magic, you guys.

I didn't take close-up 'before' and 'after' pictures (you can see that at Katelyn's blog,) but holy cow. It was like they were brand new clothes again.

The next day I decided to throw my son's stinky soccer socks out there too, just to see what happened, and they smelled way better.

I'm halfway to becoming the dad on My Big Fat Greek Wedding, only with the sun instead of Windex. Unsightly blemish on your nose? Troublesome eczema? Burst appendix? Put some sunshine on it, you'll be fine.

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}

6


I'm loving one of my birthday presents, a Kevlar glove for the accident-prone (ahem) to wear when using sharp kitchen instruments, such as their mandoline for slicing vegetables.

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}

So far I haven't cut myself once and I kind of like how it makes me look like Michael Jackson.

7


We've lost our camera for the time being, so I've been taking a lot of pictures with my phone until we find it again.

I really like my new phone, but since it's got an extra-big screen I'm sometimes having trouble taking photos with it. Especially since I'm often holding a baby (or shielding the baby from his siblings) and only have one free hand.

Thinking there might be some tips and tricks or some kind of one-handed mode I don't know about, I used Google voice search (remember, I've only got one hand) to ask my phone to look up "taking pictures with a phablet."

It misunderstood me and searched for "taking pictures of a fat butt." Not a whole lot of helpful information there, but thanks for trying, Google.

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15 comments:

AnneMarie said...

I'll have to keep that Kevlar glove in mind! I cannot count how many times I've cut myself with the cheese grater (while grating cheese or potatoes, an innocent enough task) or with knives as I've sliced veggies. And I'm no perfectionist, but that row of holes would probably drive me crazy too!

Michelle said...

LOL at the last one. Hilarious. I've heard drying things in the sunshine is helpful, but I unfortunately don't have any outside sunshiney spots to try it in. One day, one day.

Unknown said...

You always crack me up! The credit card company thing - hysterical.
Yes the sun is so great... I put my used furniture finds out there with some baking soda before bringing them in ;)
Hope you find your camera!

Debbie said...

Hi Jenny, you're right once you've seen the misaligned holes you can't unsee them! How odd that it was made like that in the first place. When I next dig out the old baby clothes I'm going to try cleaning them with vinegar and sunshine as the yellow is not a pleasant colour.

I love my phablet too, never tried Googling it though!

xx

PurpleSlob said...

Oh, Jenny, only you and the ironic phone calls. Please excuse me, but it made me grin! Jenny "Jackson" you are ROCKING that glove!! I need one too, in the interest of public safety! Fat butt made me belly laugh out loud!!

Unknown said...

Most phones have a way for you to set it so you can say "smile" or "cheese" and it snaps the picture! Check inside your camera app and see if yours has it. VERY helpful!

Jenny Evans said...

We just got a new cheese grater and it is SHARP. I have cut myself numerous times and have contemplated blogging about it but it's too gross. I really thought I might need stitches once (I didn't go because I hate the ER), and it took forever to heal.

Jenny Evans said...

Line drying sounds great but you actually have to remember to bring the clothes in before it rains, so it's not a perfect system.

Jenny Evans said...

That's another great use for the sun, it disinfects everything.

Jenny Evans said...

Well for Pete's sake don't try voice search!

Jenny Evans said...

I did find that out after a second, more successful Google search. I can say "smile," "cheese," or "shoot" but I have to say them pretty loud in order to get my phone to take the picture. I was hoping just a quiet murmur would do but I kind of have to yell it which is a little weird.

Queen Mom Jen said...

Yeah, unfortunately I spotted the flaw on the music stand before the helpfully placed arrow. I am frightened for myself.

Sheila @ The Deliberate Reader said...

I didn't even know they made gloves like that - I need to get one for myself as I love my mandolin but am always scared when I use it - I'm not coordinated enough to ever feel comfortable with it (and the guard that came with it is just about useless.)

Jenny Evans said...

It's hard to be like us.

Jenny Evans said...

I don't trust the guard, either. We recently upgraded our cheese grater and it's so sharp I sheared off my knuckle several times and forbade all my children to grate cheese until we got the gloves.