Friday, June 5, 2015

7 Quick Takes about Mister Rogers' Identity Theft, Being Stalked by Saint Nick, and What Happens When You Send a Food Snob to Get Milk

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! That means 7 quick thoughts for the last 7 days.


1



Even if poems aren't normally your thing, you'll want to head over to Bonbon Break where my post "If Babies Wrote Poetry" was published this week! (I'm toying with the idea of writing a Volume 2, so any suggestions for new material is welcome  just leave a comment at the bottom of this page or on Unremarkable Files' Facebook page.)



P.S: Every time I mention the site, my 3-year-old thinks I'm saying "bonfire break" and we end up having a 20-minute conversation about S'mores.


2


We don't own a TV, but sometimes when we hit the 300th "why?" question of the day before 9:30 AM, I get out the iPad and find a show on Amazon Prime for my preschooler to watch while I go hide in the garage with a bag of fun-size Snickers. 

Lately she's been watching Daniel TigerAnd man, does that tiger got some 'splainin to do.

First he stole Mister Rogers' theme song and messed it up, then he hijacked trolley to take it on joyrides with his friends who he also stole from Mister Rogers (hello-o, Prince Wednesday*?) And since tigers don't have opposable thumbs and that particular tiger is supposed to be a 4-year-old child, can someone please explain to me how he's tying his shoes?

I feel like this "Daniel Tiger" kid is trying to pull a fast one over on all of us.

*My 3-year-old thinks Prince Wendesday's name is "Prince Onesie."


—3


Other than the fact that he's trying to replace Mr. Rogers (an offense hurtful to me at many levels,) I have to admit that I kind of like Daniel Tiger.


Each episode focuses on a different life lesson by putting it to music and singing it 460 times — but some of them go over my daughter's head.

The other day they were singing, "When you're frustrated, take a step back and ask for help." Later that day my daughter got stuck halfway in and halfway out of her seat belt and was legit freaking out. Trying to calm her down, I asked, "Remember what Daniel Tiger says?"

Tearfully she wailed, "But I can't take a step back because I'm stuck in my seat!"


—4




After my 11-year-old was drawing with a friend at our house, I found this on the floor:


It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}
This would be weird even if it wasn't June.

I'm envisioning this on a poster advertising a new horror movie. "Santa: He Sees You When You're Sleeping..." I wish I made YouTube videos because the imaginary trailer for this is totally playing in my mind.


—5



Speaking of which, has anyone seen this?




I thought it was funny until my kids made me watch it 6 times in a row.



—6



Lately I've been on sort of an informal grocery shopping strike, so our cupboards have been a little bare. (That's a nice way of saying that I've been sending the kids to school with whatever odd lunches we can cobble together and hoping their teachers don't get worried and call CPS. I've also been mildly concerned that we're all going to get scurvy.)


I've talked before about how Phillip is a food snob. Do you know what happens when ask a food snob to buy milk and some fresh fruits and vegetables on his way home from work?


These. He comes home with these.



It's 7 Quick Takes Friday! How was your week?  {posted @ Unremarkable Files}
Coconut nectar and agave: I have no idea what a person would actually do with either of these.

Well, at least he also got the milk and vegetables. Thanks, honey.


—7


The morning after the grocery store incident, he came up to me smiling.


"I had the best breakfast this morning," he said.


"Oh?"


"Sourdough gluten-free blueberry waffles topped with kefir, chia seed pudding, and coconut nectar!"


"You realize you sound like a nutcase, don't you?"


We both laughed. He's aware, and he doesn't take himself too seriously. 
But if he starts to sound like these ladies, I'm going to start worrying.





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6 comments:

  1. Your 3 year old sounds hilarious, though I'm sure you have moments like the one my 2 going on teen is having where she's just shrieking about something (I put the milk in the wrong cup? because I don't want her spilling the milk out of a "real" cup). Popping over to Bonbon break to read now.

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  2. My mom has lived on a grocery shopping strike her whole life. My 18 year old cousin has been living with my parents for the last year and she found the bareness of the cupboards disconcerting. She would be gently asking, "Umm, Aunt Cindy, when are we going to the store?" while all the expert kids just know that it's time to survive on popcorn and oatmeal (always the last thing to go, obviously).

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  3. I love the coconut oil video, absolutely hilarious. You should search on YouTube for "how to become gluten intolerant".

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    1. I watched it and I really don't know if Phillip would be offended or think it was funny. Emailing it now to find out.

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  4. #4 is very Eye of Sauron. Is he a LOTR fan?
    Would love to see your Santa horror film trailer!

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  5. oh goodness, loved the Frozen trailer!

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